Chapter 12 - Sophie does not call Emily Mom
Sophie called me Daddy because Caroline had used that word when showing her my photograph.
She did not call Emily Mommy.
She called her:
Emily.
That hurt Emily.
She never complained.
One morning Sophie asked:
“Are you my real mom?”
Emily answered:
“Caroline was your mom. I’m the person whose egg helped make you.”
Sophie frowned.
“Like chicken?”
Emily laughed despite herself.
“Not exactly.”
Then:
“Are you also my mom?”
Emily paused.
“If someday that word feels right to you, I would be honored. But you don’t have to call me anything you don’t want.”
Sophie nodded.
“Emily.”
“Emily is good.”
Then Lily shouted from hallway:
“Mommy!”
Sophie looked toward her.
No jealousy.
Just observation.
Later she asked me:
“Why did you make Lily but not know me?”
I said:
“We helped create embryos before either of you were born. A clinic used one embryo to create your pregnancy without telling us. We came back years later and another embryo became Lily.”
“So Lily was in freezer?”
I nearly choked.
“In a very simplified way, an early embryo was frozen safely.”
“Was I?”
“Yes.”
“Were we next to each other?”
“We don’t know.”
She liked that possibility.
“Lily says yes.”
Lily said many things with confidence.
Then therapy.
Sophie had grief for Caroline.
Fear of Mara.
Confusion about us.
No one pushed:
You’re home now.
Because our home had literally been where she was hidden against her will.
Language matters.
We said:
May you like
“You’re safe here tonight.”
One day at a time.
